56 days in

Let's just say my commitment to the program has been better than my commitment to blogging.
I'm 56 days into the 84 days of living exclusively on OptiFast 900. That's 2/3rds complete. It's been remarkable to see the shift from day 1. In the beginning I was worried about staying on the OptiFast. Now, on day 56, my worries are about re-introducing food.
The 2nd week of PMS was as brutal as the first. It's a struggle to stay on program and it's frustrating to GAIN WEIGHT on 900 calories a day. But it's educational to learn that if I hold true to being healthy even when it's hard, even when the results aren't there, at least I don't go backwards (much). I can hold within a pound or two and that might be the best it will ever be.
My cheats have been tiny and insignificant. There was a slice of fresh carrot and a lick of stuffing during Thanksgiving. The odd lick of a finger when making the kids food - almost always mindless. I chewed on a piece of ham and spit it out. There was a day when I started on tiny pieces of roast but I stopped pretty quickly. That's over 56 days! I'm pretty impressed with myself.

The worries of eating

There is an ease and convenience to the liquid diet. The lack of choice - for me there's not even a flavour option - just makes it simple. I grab a package for every meal I'll miss. Take a shaker. I know now that bottled water and ice are easily available at Subway, both my work spaces and (I've heard) McDonald's.
My sense is that I'm going to miss the simple packing and preparation when I return to real food. The return of stress of making the right choice and the work of creating food that's appropriate will both hit at the same time.
The Partners for Healthier Weight program spends the next few weeks talking about nutrition. It's exciting to have the opportunity to study the value of food and understand nutrition.
I wish I could embrace the counselling aspects of the program as well as the nutrition education. There is value in the counselling. My challenge is the willingness to work as it's needed. Some of it is just hard for me. Journaling makes me uncomfortable.  The concept of building my support systems makes me value my friends even more and greatly appreciate their loyalty.

Not pumping iron....

Not pumping iron, swallowing iron.

The post of a few weeks ago reflected a moment in time. One hopes the worst period on this program for me.

It's been getting better again. I'm on my 2nd week of adding an iron supplement to my program and it really seems to be making a difference.

Palafer CF is my drug of choice for now. Hopefully it'll bounce my often low iron back up. It had dropped more than 50% from week 1 blood work to week 6.

Maybe this will start my energy levels in the right direction.