Running Large

56 days in

2011-10-26T23:14:00.000-03:00

Let's just say my commitment to the program has been better than my commitment to blogging.
I'm 56 days into the 84 days of living exclusively on OptiFast 900. That's 2/3rds complete. It's been remarkable to see the shift from day 1. In the beginning I was worried about staying on the OptiFast. Now, on day 56, my worries are about re-introducing food.
The 2nd week of PMS was as brutal as the first. It's a struggle to stay on program and it's frustrating to GAIN WEIGHT on 900 calories a day. But it's educational to learn that if I hold true to being healthy even when it's hard, even when the results aren't there, at least I don't go backwards (much). I can hold within a pound or two and that might be the best it will ever be.
My cheats have been tiny and insignificant. There was a slice of fresh carrot and a lick of stuffing during Thanksgiving. The odd lick of a finger when making the kids food - almost always mindless. I chewed on a piece of ham and spit it out. There was a day when I started on tiny pieces of roast but I stopped pretty quickly. That's over 56 days! I'm pretty impressed with myself.

The worries of eating

2011-10-26T23:13:00.003-03:00

There is an ease and convenience to the liquid diet. The lack of choice - for me there's not even a flavour option - just makes it simple. I grab a package for every meal I'll miss. Take a shaker. I know now that bottled water and ice are easily available at Subway, both my work spaces and (I've heard) McDonald's.
My sense is that I'm going to miss the simple packing and preparation when I return to real food. The return of stress of making the right choice and the work of creating food that's appropriate will both hit at the same time.
The Partners for Healthier Weight program spends the next few weeks talking about nutrition. It's exciting to have the opportunity to study the value of food and understand nutrition.
I wish I could embrace the counselling aspects of the program as well as the nutrition education. There is value in the counselling. My challenge is the willingness to work as it's needed. Some of it is just hard for me. Journaling makes me uncomfortable. The concept of building my support systems makes me value my friends even more and greatly appreciate their loyalty.

Not pumping iron....

2011-10-16T22:30:00.000-03:00

Not pumping iron, swallowing iron.

The post of a few weeks ago reflected a moment in time. One hopes the worst period on this program for me.

It's been getting better again. I'm on my 2nd week of adding an iron supplement to my program and it really seems to be making a difference.

Palafer CF is my drug of choice for now. Hopefully it'll bounce my often low iron back up. It had dropped more than 50% from week 1 blood work to week 6.

Maybe this will start my energy levels in the right direction.

The hardest week yet

2011-09-29T11:00:00.001-03:00

So the quick calculations have me at 27 days in to an 84 day process and complete 33%! That means 108 Optifast down and 228 to go.

Weeks 1, 2 & 3 were a relative breeze. Week 4 was horrible. Saturday and Sunday were miserable. I spent the whole time napping. 4 naps in 2 days? A bit much for me.

Temptation has been everywhere and my desire to eat isn't waning. I'm craving salt - it almost seems like I can smell salt. To the point where I wouldn't make good choices. The salted cucumber I craved in week 1 has been replaced by a desire for potato chips.
The consistency is helping, and there is weight loss. But looking back over the last 3 weeks it doesn't seem worth the effort. If rate I'm losing doesn't increase my 12 weeks fasting will have a total impact of:

reducing my activity level,
losing some of my positive habits around exercise,
increasing some of my bad food cravings,
missing my kids and stressing my husband, and
losing on average 2lbs a week.

Would 24lbs be worth it? Would 50lbs?

Is it worth running slower, feeling weaker? Missing family meals? Giving up an extra evening a week that could be spent exercising, being with my kids and giving my husband a break?

Right now the answer is a big fat IF. This is only worthwhile IF it gives me a higher longer quality of life. And my confidence about that is falling.

Not something I can answer yet, but at (what I hope is) the end of the worst week yet, it's hard to be positive. But it's not impossible.

There are others out there

2011-09-27T00:32:00.001-03:00

Just got a lead on a new to me blog. I'll be following along with http://optifastblog.wordpress.com/.

Running Large: Running Again

2011-09-19T23:21:00.000-03:00

Today I start back to a Running Room clinic. John Stanton is going to be able to retire on what I've spent on the For Women Only program, Learn to Run program and 5km Program. (To be fair, I probably made back what I've paid when I was a co-instructor for the 5k.)

My latest foray into Learn to Run was reasonably successful. I worked my way up to 10&1x2. So I'm moving up with most of my clinic to the 5km program. I can already do the time, I tried it out a couple of weeks ago. 10&1x3 is doable. At my speed there's not much distance covered.

On the Partners for a Healthier Weight program during the 900 calorie OptiFast phase I can't increase my exercise. But since I've dropped a few other activities because summer is over, it should be fine.

The goal for this clinic is to keep moving. Based on my runs over the last 2 weeks I'll continue to lose speed from my super-slow speed walker pace to an even slower elderly-strollers-will-pass-me pace. Luckily there's a running buddy at my speed who keeps me at a reasonable starting pace. Looking forward to seeing her tonight.

Lesson 2: There is a choice

2011-09-18T19:55:00.000-03:00

Taking away choice is - at the moment - a relief. It removes the stress of debate. Sometimes the choices should have been easy: greek salad vs cheesies. But sometimes they were more challenging: greek salad vs garden salad. Plus there was always a debate about enough of the right protein.

When someone else made the food, I was never confident what to pick. When I made the food the debate just happened during the preparation.

Other times it didn't seem like there was a choice at all.

As ridiculous as it sounds, to me it seemed my body was demanding a cinnamon bun. With certainty that a fortune teller would envy, I could predict that after drinking the water and eating the healthy snack I was still going to have the cinnamon bun.

But now I see how that was my choice. And it's a little scary. Because there's a slippery slope.

Friday there was a trip to Costco and the sample tables were out My husband spotted and went for onion dip on ripple potato chips. It actually went though my mind... three chips can't be many calories, maybe I can have one. (I didn't!)

But the next thought was, maybe that's why I'm still struggling to lose weight. Those little blts (bites, licks, tastes and snacks) over years must add up. If my weekly trips to Costco included 250 calories of samples, that alone could help me gain 1/2lb in one year.

Now that I know I can, the task will be to choose to skip those taste tests in the future.

Lesson 1: What you control

2011-09-16T18:47:00.001-03:00

Choosing to participate in 12-weeks of a medically supervised liquid diet teaches you a few unexpected lessons. The one that hits home right now is:

you control what you control and nothing else.

Remember just a few days ago when I was worried over my weight loss? It wasn't much worth worrying about. Because I'm certainly not worried about my weight gain. Yes, you read that right, my weight gain. I'm back up 2lbs.

Just so you know, I'm 100% faithful to the program to date. Not a morsel, calorie free or not, has passed my lips. My water intake fluctuates between three and five litres a day. So on 900 calories of a perfectly balanced meal replacement, my body can still gain weight.

Oddly, I'm not worried or frustrated. It's a relief. It's never seemed believable that hormones and water might make me gain weight. Weight can be gained even if I'm on track for balanced calorie appropriate meals and exercise! I have proof. I can only control what I can control.

Next I need to take that discovery and turn it into action. The number of pounds I weigh on any day is just a number. It can help me know when the trend is going the wrong direction. But what's really going to matter is:

making good choices as often as I can, and
not getting demoralized.

The number is just a number. It's a solution to an algorithm with too many unknown variables to calculate. It's as opaque to me as calculus. So I'll focus on what is clear. How I:

fuel my body, and
how I use my body.

Partners for a Healthier Weight: Week 3 Homework

2011-09-14T11:03:00.000-03:00

The 3rd weekly meeting was focused on emotions & behaviour and led by our team psychologist. It was heavily influenced, but not identical to, the material provided by Nestle as part of the OptiFast900 program titled "Taking charge of your attitude".

We discussed the A-B-C Model of Emotions and Behaviour. It's about how an Activating event leads to a Belief or attitude that is often destructive and the Consequence. In some cases the consequence becomes the next activating event and a destructive cycle begins. If I understand it correctly, it might go something like this for me:

Activating event: Headache
Belief: Food is going to provide comfort
Consequence: Weight gain and a sense that I might as well give up

Next in the model is introducing the Disputing thought and Effective new philosophy. So next would be:

Disputing thought: Food doesn't provide comfort and it causes long term challenges
Effective new philosophy: Food doesn't solve problems. Think about what else can help.

I'm sure I've seriously misunderstood these. Because I'm not making any progress with my homework. I need to fill in an A-B-C-D worksheet. But I'm not sure how or about what.

My weight issues are still external to me, despite lots of evidence to the contrary. Somehow I need to first recognize that I am part of the problem. That being 100lbs when I was 8 doesn't mean I have to be overweight for life. That I contributed to the weight gain. That living a life more healthy then many doesn't mean I deserve to be healthier than they are, just healthier than I was.

So any advice for filling in my worksheet?

A: Activating Event - What were you doing and with whom?

B: Beliefs/Thoughts - What was going through my mind just before I started feeling this way? What does this say about me? What am I afraid might happen? What images or memories do I have in this situation?

C: Consequences - What emotions am I feeling? What are the behavioural consequences to how I'm feeling?

D: Disputing thought - If a friend had this thought, what would I say to them? Is there an alternative way of thinking about this situation? What is the evidence that supports my thoughts and what is the evidence that does not support it?

Should I be worried the weight is coming off too fast?

2011-09-13T18:05:00.001-03:00

It doesn't seem possible, but it's true. Today it took a calendar to figure out how far into the Partners for a Healthier Weight program I am. Nineteen days on the program, 12 days on the liquid diet. That's 7% done the liquid only phase.

This may come back to haunt me, but right now, it's not that hard. There's a lot of stress involved in deciding what to eat, when to eat, when to prepare the food. Opening up a package of powder and mixing it with ice and water is easy. And knowing there's no decisions is eliminating a lot of the worry that goes into my normal eating habits.

What have I noticed after nineteen days?

Most of my pants are too big. Unusual for me, but my bra size is holding steady. The inches seem to be coming off my butt, thighs, hips and the area you work out as the obliques. Spanx are still exercise to put on. The stubborn above the belly button fat that usually shrinks with diet and exercise isn't budging.

I am tired. There's a bit of brain fog. It's difficult doing exercise that used to be easy. My 2x10&1 run was a flop on Sunday. Today walking to the car seemed like an effort.

Oh yes, and it's not easy to get blood work done in the HRM during the afternoon.

To me, my weight is coming off a bit too quickly. I am concerned that I'm losing muscle mass. Including the time on 1200 calories and OptiFast 900, it's been about 12 lbs lost in 19 days. My exercise is scaled back already and I'm following the plan exactly, so I notified the team in Halifax about my concerns. Sounds like they'll have questions next time they see me. But they're not worried.

Next steps:

Wake up every morning and stay on plan for the day.
Make sure the team is ok with the weight loss.
As my current exercise program ends, replace it with one focused on building muscle probably at the Sackville Sports Stadium.

Partners for a Healthier Weight - Day 11

2011-09-06T11:44:00.001-03:00

I`m still trudging along on the Partners for a Healthier Weight. No taste or food has passed my tongue except for the vanilla or chocolate Optifast 900. In the first 4 days on a liquid diet there have been a few moments I expected to be challenging.

My family met with my sister and parents on an outing that included a picnic. They were great and didn`t offer me any food, but did push a bottle of water on me. (Not such a bad thing).
Attended a birthday party with snacks, cake and ice cream. Saying no the first round was easy, but I did have to get up and move away from the leftover cake.
Helped my husband prepare the kids food for supper. He was taking care of diapers, pasta and cooking. So I pitched in to slice up cucumbers, cheese and ham. It went ok... but I`m upstairs typing instead of downstairs with them because the smells were tempting.

Today I`m actually hungry. Maybe because breakfast was late? Maybe because my back hurts and that makes me want to eat? But I don't want anything sweet. Cucumbers have become an over powering smell for me. (I love cucumbers with salt). I would trade a days worth of packets for tuna and cheese or just about anything with salt (especially cucumbers).

The idea of going without real food is still baffling to me. Right now the approach is get up every morning and try my best for the day. Celebrate how far I've come already. So when I go to bed tonight, I'll be 5% done the liquid diet phase. Down to 80 days. In moments by myself I'm still too near tears about the fact that this is what it's taking me to lose weight, that I couldn't manage it by myself.

But I am losing weight, and I am trying to keep habits that kept off the weight from my first weight drop from near 280lbs to between 220 & 230lbs. So I log my food. (Silly, right? The same thing 4 times a day). My water is all logged, too. I weigh myself everyday, but don't get worried about it. Interestingly I did gain weight at least one day on the program. Keeping my exercise up is a challenge. There's a little lack of energy and also a nagging back pain that started the same day as the liquid diet.

Let's see how tomorrow goes.

What is Partners for a Healthier Weight?

2011-09-05T22:25:00.003-03:00

To quote some of their welcome package, Partners for a Healthier Weight is a "medically and psychologically supervised" program that "uses a meal replacement called Optifast which provides 900 calories per day. The meal replacement is 12 weeks in duration and is followed by a 6 week transition to food. Regular physician/nurse assessments and blood work are all a mandatory part of the medical monitoring.

The meal replacement will certainly help you lose weight; however it is the weekly facilitator-guided sessions that are essential to your long-term success!"

Before the program starts there needs to be a referral from your family doctor, an initial fasting blood work, and an extended online survey. The results from the blood work and survey are the basis for the meetings with the nurse, dietician, and psychologist. They all assess you for your likely success, review the survey and have some questions of their own. Plus there's a bit of a physical with the nurse.

Week 1 was a welcome and introduction where the nurse, dietician, psychologist and physiotherapist are all present. Because of the pre-work I'd already met the nurse, dietician and psychologist. There was a meet and greet to get to know some of the other participants. Once we'd done the meet and greet the group was divided in half with half starting with a walk test and half starting with weighs and measures.

The weighs and measures were much what you'd expect. Waist measurement, a body comp analysis and an extended blood pressure test. I've forgotten the waist measure and blood pressure, but I have the Tanita Body Composition Analyzer TBF-310 results.

Height 5'5"
Weight 226.0
BMI 37.6
Impedance 422
Fat % 45.8
Fat Mass 103.5 lbs
FFM 122.5 lbs

The walk test was a bit of a surprise to me. They suggested comfortable clothes and sneakers. It turned out to be the 10 M Shuttle Walk Test. I was kicked out at level 11 for not making the time. After it was over I regretted not wearing my sports bra - it was nearing a full out run for me. Unfortunately my course was shared with another who went even farther than I did. I probably went out because of the pressure on my back and hip of always having to turn left and the dizziness. Wish it could be done again and there would be an option to turn left or right on demand!

Most of the rest of the night was caught up in signing away waivers, quick talks and getting an intro to week 1.

Week 1 was a 1200 calorie diet with a strict measure of tracking. Each day there were:

5 70 cal servings of grains and starches (only 2 could be bread, corn, potato, turnip, squash)
3-4 65 cal servings of fruit
unlimited vegetables
2-3 90 cal servings of milk or alternatives (milk, yogurt)
6-7 75 cal servings of meat or alternatives (1 oz) includes cheese, eggs, peanut butter, legumes
3 45 cal servings of fats
2-4 condiment servings of 20 cal

The first few days I struggled to get to 1200 calories. I was out and about and didn't have the reference with me. By the end of the weekend, knowing it was your last time in a long time to chew food, it was really hard to stick to the program. There is a cupcake splurge I must admit to being the lone participant in. There were also many of my favorite healthier foods - spinach, corn, raspberries, and apples.

The first week had a high level of anxiety for me. The idea of not eating was just so far out of my realm of possibility it was stressful. There were nightmares and random feelings of being completely overwhelmed.

It's actually been less challenging to be on the liquid diet than to think about being on the liquid diet.

Partners for a Healthier Weight - Day 9

2011-09-03T23:48:00.000-03:00

More details to come later on the Partners for a Healthier Weight Program. But I wanted to share that I am enrolled and doing my homework.

What that means today is that I`ve just finished day two of 84 days on a liquid diet of 900 calories. That means only 328 (of 336) more drinks to go. And then, presumably, I get to crunch something.

The liquid product is surprisingly disgusting. The OptiFast 900 in Canada is only available in vanilla and chocolate. Both flavours taste vaguely like cake batter. Cold seems to improve the taste some. Made with ice in a blender and using a straw to minimize time on the tongue works best for me. I`ve also gone well past the recommended amount of water to dilute the taste. Both flavours of OptiFast 900 taste better when I`m hungry - but with four packets a day - I`ve only been hungry when out longer than I expected. (Wishing for other flavours or chewing, but not actually hungry).

Odd side effects have been minimal. Behaviour changes are a bit surprising. I`m brushing my teeth constantly. Not certain if that`s to rid my mouth of the flavour or because the toothpaste introduces another taste. The dry(er) mouth is noticeable, but not problematic. My lips have also dried out so there`s an increase usage of lip balm.

My early speculation is that the nasty taste for me - and the almost gagging response to the last few mouthfuls - is not dissimilar to how I feel about many proteins (especially powdered), bananas and yogurt. Might explain the low iron that`s plagued me through life.

As for the running, it`s still going. I finished the learn to run clinic with a slow 3k. This week I got in a couple of 10 & 1s on Sunday, Thursday and Friday. Thursday was about 2.7 in 24 minutes, Friday was 2.5k in the same 24 minutes or so. Not fast... but still moving.

Back to the start

2011-08-20T23:10:00.000-03:00

Pleased to say I'm finally through the barrier. Thursday night I ran 2x10&1s. Slow is the word, but done is all that matters.

Considering joining a 5k clinic in the fall to keep up the motivation. Setting a goal, maybe a time to complete a 5k. Because getting there a 3rd time just doesn't seem that rewarding on its own.

But scheduling around the possibility of doing the Partners for a Healthier Weight program.

Bluenose Marathon 2011

2011-05-22T22:21:00.000-03:00

What a great day. Some might say it was a little chilly. Given the rain and cold that everyone has been training in, Sunday May 22, 2011 provided good weather for those running the 5k, 10k, half and full marathon.

We dragged the kids out to watch the races. Saw friends go by in the 5k and marathon, but missed the half and 10k folks. I walked 7.2k, but daughter and husband were around 5k and the two littlest spent some time riding. I mapped it to see how far we traveled over the three or four hours.
http://www.mapmyrun.com/routes/view/35073292

My husband is determined to do the 10k next year. (He's perfectly capable, just needs to put in the training time). I'm not committing to any Bluenose goal, but I'd love it to be an option.

Congratulations to all who ran today. The youngest we cheered on was about 7 and the oldest was plenty old enough to know better. All my friends did great and I'm loving watching them post times and stories on Facebook and Twitter.

Catching up

2011-04-11T22:05:00.000-03:00

Does leaving the blog mostly stagnant for six months make me a bad blogger?

Absolutely.

Am I still focused on getting healthy?

Not really.

Am I still running?

Yes. Occasionally. Once or twice a week, 2&1s or 5&1s or 6&1s or a fast walk.

Am I hurt?

Slightly. But not enough to keep me from running.

What's up?

Good question. I think leading the Learn to Run program, rolling right into co-instructing the 5k program had me ignore a mild annoyance until it became a slight injury. Put off running for 6 weeks I gained a few pounds and haven't bounced back.

Am I coming back?

Hell yes! Tonight was a little 2k to test out shoes. Last night was a Hard Core Strong Body class at the Sackville Sports Stadium, which I got up at 5:30am for when it was at 6pm. So I was awake. Home. No kids up yet and there was a treadmill. I pounded out a little run and a little walk before 7:30am on a Sunday.

What about blogging?

Blogging won't be my focus. But check back now and again because I'll be posting. Follow me on twitter @runninglarge for more timely updates.

Not dead yet...

2010-10-21T15:01:00.000-03:00

Forgive me. There was Monty Python contest in Halifax this week. Many many quotes accompanying my drive home.

But the intent is there. The blog is not dead yet. I'm just a little distracted. I'm co-instructor for a Running Room clinic, working full time, part time masters student, full-time Mum and over committed volunteer.

What can you learn from that? Exactly what I'm offering. Make priorities. Make sacrifices. But keep running!

Running Gear

2010-09-01T02:27:00.000-03:00

What I love:
Nike+
Sneakers
Running shirts, shorts, pants

What I wish was better:
Timex Ironman Triathlon
Garmin

What I haven't gotten the hang of yet:
GymBoss

What I'd like to try:
Nike+ bracelet

What's your favorite gear?

Then & Now

2010-08-03T21:37:00.004-03:00

There's a change in perspective in my life. Because I've come to realize it's an amazing life. One filled with privilege and wonder. A life that is fortunate.

Don't get me wrong. Complaining is an art I've perfected. A career I treasured has been changed completely by new personnel. My kids make me yell at my kids far too often. There are days when cleaning poop off of two children and pee off the floor happens. There isn't a car I can't curse into being a lemon.

But but but... I can run. My body works reasonable well for all the extra weight. When I'm running, I think about the other amazing things in my life. Some of the highlights are:

My wonderful husband who really couldn't be any better suited to me.
An amazing family of 3 healthy little girls who each have their own personalities.
The leave-it-to-beaver home life I had as a kid and the sisters and parents that continue to be part of our lives.
Friendship offered by many of the same people who have been my friends forever, for half my life or even just a little less.
The opportunity to learn, read, speak, write and argue without fear.
Never knowing the fear of poverty, or questioning whether there was enough to feed, clothe and keep ourselves comfortable.

@Jen_Saunders said the other day, "there is no before & after, only then & now". I think that defines a shift I am beginning. There will be no after to weight loss. No after for running. There will just be what was then and what is now.

It's time to stop thinking about before as the day I ran 10km or the day I realized 300lbs was inevitable with my lifestyle. It's time to stop thinking about after as a picture in a WW magazine with my size 24 jeans held in front of me.

There is just what was then and what I am now.

I define the now every day, every hour and every moment with the choices and decisions I make.

Gingerbread man

2010-07-31T23:19:00.000-03:00

The rhyme goes: Run, run as fast as you can.
You can't catch me I'm the gingerbread man.

So how come I don't get faster when I eat the gingerbread man?

Sometimes it's not a great run

2010-07-26T23:31:00.000-03:00

Despite some excellent company, tonights run was a slog. I'm sore and achy.
But I did finish up 4 sets of 5&1 minute.

Things I have learned and can share:

Diet matters
Drinking water helps
Stretching is important
Pain killers are a very good friend.

Off to bed.

Logging a walk

2010-07-19T23:20:00.000-03:00

Was sitting at my desk being inappropriately annoyed at something or someone when I remembered I'd dragged my sneakers to work. So 10 minutes later my iPod, my sneakers and a t-shirt were off for an energetic walk in the hot-hot-heat.

Felt great! Wonderful pace. Nice music. A little shade. A little sun. Almost had my smile back when I returned to work.

It's all about time

2010-07-18T23:19:00.000-03:00

When to run...

Joined the Running Room Sunday morning Run Club for a lovely little jaunt. The group did 3 & 1 x 5. So glad to be out in the morning, because it's getting hot by 9am. So an 8:30am start is way better than the 6:00pm start on Wednesdays.

The run was good. Helped to loosen up stiff muscles from my Saturday morning treadmill run. The boot camp left me pleasantly tired and sore. My muscles are feeling like I had a nice workout.

Was hoping to get out for another run on Monday morning, but it's almost 11:30pm and I'm still awake. My guess is that I'll be running out the door feeling rushed to work with no run done.

Ran

2010-07-17T13:55:00.000-03:00

Made it to the gym for a run today. Managed to get a full 10 min set in. A small 1 minute recovery. A final 8 minute run to finish it off.

Solid pace, but was a bit too much before boot camp.

What are you doing this weekend?

Recipe: Homemade Fudgesicle

2010-07-09T10:10:00.003-03:00

My girls have been eating too much junk. The end result is they're begging for more. To beat the requests for freezies, I decided to try making my own fudgie ice cream snacks.

Banana Fudgesicle

Ingredients

3 VERY ripe bananas

1/4 c chocolate chips

2 T low fat peanut butter

Instructions

Barely melt chocolate chips

Stir peanut butter into melted chocolate

Use food processor, Magic Bullet or blender to mix all 3 ingredients.

Use cooking spray on popsicle forms

Pour mix into popsicle forms

Freeze for 4+ hours

Eat!

This treat was very rich. Next time I'll make it with less peanut butter and chocolate. Might try replacing chocolate with cocoa. I'm sure you could make it without the peanut butter for those who need to avoid nuts.

Really enjoyed the one I tried tonight. Way more than this guy enjoyed his Nonfat Milk, Sugar, Corn Syrup Solids, Cocoa (Processed With Alkali) (Adds A Trivial Amount Of Fat), Modified Food Starch, Soy Protein Isolate, Microcrystalline Cellulose, Mono and Diglycerides (Adds A Trivial Amount Of Fat), Cellulose Gum, Guar Gum, Polysorbate 65 & Polysorbate 80, Carrageenan, Salt, Natural Flavor and Artificial Flavor treat.

But it's worth noting that it was probably a shortage of water that has me craving the sweets. These seem like a much better choice then the chocolate chip cookies I wanted to make!

Photo courtesy of Ian Hoar

Run, run, as fast as you can

2010-07-05T23:00:00.000-03:00

I don't run very fast. So it was an easy decision to offer to be a 'sweeper' for the Learn to Run clinic. My role as one of the group leaders is to make sure:

No one gets left behind.
No one is lost.
No one gets left on the road.

After my clinic, I wasn't expecting this to be a very challenging job. My speed will keep me close to the back middle, so I would slow a little and have some company. The Running Room's clinic is Thursday nights this term and I assumed a small group (20?).

Well, what my parents told me regularly as a teen - assume makes an ASS out of U and ME. This group is pushing 35. Being 1 of 3 group leaders is hard. No one is running the pace they want. It's like the beginning of a race - but for the whole run.

People don't want to slow down. And really? Who am I to tell them they should?

But if you're doing 1 & 2s for 7 sets, and you're in the front of the pack for the first 3 and walking the last 3? You're going out too fast.

When the group moves to 1 & 1s for 10 sets and you're still in the front for the first 3 and walking the last 3? You're going out too fast.

If you're trying to learn to run and you can't breath at the end of a minute? You're going out too fast.

It's not about being fast. It's about getting it done.

It's Legs and Lungs

2010-07-03T22:48:00.001-03:00

It's true to say that my first attempt at learn to run was a failure. My second was difficult, but successful.

Throughout my second Learn to Run clinic I experienced difficulty at every level. Every week we increased the consecutive minutes running was harder. My legs were sore. My lungs hurt from the effort. My trip home was just thinking about the stretching, the waffle, the shower and the nap. Really? Once I'd done my run for a day I was done for the day.

This time around was a little different. Running came back slowly post-baby #3. But effort was made to get in shape with classes, gym routine, walking, ellipticals, etc. It's worked. Getting my run in for the day is just part of the day. Unless I got up at the crack-of-stupid for my run, I can get through a run day without a nap.

Maybe it's thrown my balance off a little, too.

My legs are ready for more - longer strides, further distance, faster pace. My lungs? Are dying. I feel like a smoker struggling for my last breath.

Any advice on how to get back in sync? (Besides not working out and letting my legs weaken to my lungs pace.)

Great run

2010-06-25T21:27:00.000-03:00

No blogging.
Little twitter.
Less activity.
Almost no running.

That describes my last 3 weeks. Alternating between sadness for the end of my year long maternity leave and happiness at the enormously privilege it is to have my life there hasn't been much healthy going on.

But last nights run was great. Surprisingly great. I did my 1 & 1s x 10 with the Learn to Run clinic. (Walked the last few to make sure everyone made it back). Finished that up with some socializing. Then hit the road again for 10 & 1 x 2. It was hard. I wanted to give up at 3 minutes, and 5 minutes and 8 minutes on each 10 minute set. But I didn't. And it felt so good to make it. To be done. To complete. Even a few minutes on the run felt great!

Pretty sure it wouldn't have happened without the massage from Breathe in Bedford. My flexibility is amped way past normal. Massages will become a regular part of my live better, take on the world, challenge myself way of living.

Running. Oh yeah. Running was the goal.

2010-06-09T12:46:00.001-03:00

So I finished the Learn to Run program at the Running Room. It was great fun once again. I'm proud and pleased I can run 10 minutes at a time and cover about 3km in 22 minutes or so.

I didn't pick up my pace the way I hoped I might. So I'm going to do the program again. There will be challenges this time. My work life resumes. The girls start their sports. Our schedule gets out of control. But I think I can make it work. And I'm sure I can KILL a 30 second run right now. Especially since I can kill it at the end of a 10 minute run.

The other part of success will be introducing some cross training. Last month it was a "Biggest Loser" workout. This month a Beach Body Workout. But what and when is still up in the air.

Are you running? How's it going?

Fight to the Finish Week 4

2010-05-19T09:46:00.000-03:00

My Weigh In Results

Last week I forgot to weigh in. Two weeks ago I weighed in at 216.4lbs. Today… 215lbs.
My attempt at math:
216.4 - 215 = -1.4lbs

Goal 1 is to get below 200lbs, my first goal was 20.3lbs away.
Goal 2 is to get to my goal weight of 180lbs, my second goal is 40.3lbs away.
The % for these:
26% of the way to goal 1
13% of the way to to goal 2

Music for Running Fat & Large

2010-05-13T08:33:00.001-03:00

The CRTC may have ruined me. My music taste is questionable at best. The preference is pretty strictly Canadian music, musicals and pop targeting teens - in that order.

My running "On the Run" playlist on my early generation iPod nano is heavily influenced by my preferences. That latest song that seems to get me moving is Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne. It fits the category of Canadian & pop.

It's replaced Sum 41's Fat Lip from the All Killer, No Filler album.

These are making it pretty clear to me I may have some inner teen angst haunting me despite approaching my 37th birthday! Especially since I'm pretty comfortable declaring myself a "casualty of society" and "victim of... conformity".

What do you listen to while running?
What would you recommend I add to my play list?

Fight to the Finish Week 2

2010-05-05T16:14:00.002-03:00

My Weigh In Results

Last week I weighed in at 216.0lbs. Today… 216.4lbs.
Oh no! That's not the right direction.
My attempt at math:
216 - 216.4 = +.4lbs

Then I used the calculator at fitwatch to figure out that is .19% of my bodyweight.

That
Goal 1 is to get below 200lbs, my first goal was 20.3lbs away.
Goal 2 is to get to my goal weight of 180lbs, my second goal is 40.2lbs away.
The % for these:
21% of the way to goal 1
10% of the way to to goal 2

As I sit here eating a spinach salad and getting ready for a run? I have nothing but a heavy sigh.

Run run run run! Running Large, Running Fat but running.

2010-05-02T21:14:00.000-03:00

Oh yeah, this blog started to talk about my return to running. But this whole healthy living, healthy eating thing seems to be taking priority.

Well, it is - and it isn't. My return to running is underway. The Running Room's Learn to Run clinic is a great way to keep me motivated. We've moved up to 4 minute runs and 1 minute walks. Total time out is about 20 minutes and my iPod Nike+ claims we're covering about 2.5km. The good is the motivation to keep going. Enjoying the Wednesday night and (sometimes) the Sunday morning run clubs. Barry is a solid leader. Encouraging and not annoying. The bad? Speed dating was a failure. I have no new running partner. A key part of my first success was finding the perfect partner, so it's disappointing not to have found 'the one'.

I've consistently gotten out for 3 runs a week since the class started 5 weeks ago. This week I'll be short an outdoor run, but I did get one in on the treadmill.

Canada's Food Guide - I'm lovin' it!

2010-04-29T09:34:00.000-03:00

I am in love with eating Canada's Food Guide. It might ~~not~~ be helping me drop huge pounds. It's been a great behaviour modification tool. It's family friendly.

This week we setup our family Wall Pops white board with a simple grid. Our names across the top and the food groups down the side. Each block has the recommended number of that food group and enough room to check off the number of servings eaten.

It's a bit much for the 3 year old. Especially since she over eats for her 'age' but is probably bang on considering she's about a 4-year-olds size. The 6-year-old is learning it at school at the same time. She's getting it.

Maybe it's time for McDonalds to give up there "I'm lovin' it" theme and hand it over to something my family really all can love. The simplicity and healthy eating of the Canada Food Guide.

Fight to the Finish: First week results

2010-04-28T21:38:00.002-03:00

My Weigh In Results

Last week I weighed in at 220.2lbs. Today… 216.0lbs.
That's down! The right direction.
My attempt at math:
220.2 - 216 = 4.2lbs lost.

Then I used the calculator at fitwatch to figure out that is 1.91% of my bodyweight.

Goal 1 is to get below 200lbs, my first goal was 20.3lbs away.
Goal 2 is to get to my goal weight of 180lbs, my second goal is 40.2lbs away.
The % for these:
21% of the way to goal 1
10% of the way to to goal 2

This makes it sound achievable!

Fight to the Finish: Blogger Battle Royale

2010-04-27T19:30:00.002-03:00

Hanging around with the cool kids was really never my goal. But beating them? And beating them at their own 'game'? That's something I can get behind.

So when popular healthy living blogger Mische challenged No More Bacon's Ryan to a Fight to the Finish, I just knew I had to jump in. Especially with the trash talk. Love the trash talk.

So I am in, even though I can no longer find where I threw my hat in the ring. My starting weight was 220.2lbs. My goal is to smash through to 210lbs and try on a weight that starts with one hundred for the first time in my adult life.

With @jeninRL and @MrsFatass in on it, it can't help but be a fun way to inspire us all.

Fiber 1 Chocolate Peanut Butter Haystacks recipe

2010-04-24T22:35:00.002-03:00

Craving a snack tonight and it had to be sweet. It's been a day of heavy exposure to sweets and goodies, but no eating. Tomorrow there's going to be cake, but today was just the torture of baking.

Fiber 1 Chocolate Peanut Butter Haystacks
Ingredients

1/2 c chocolate chips
1/2 c low fat peanut butter
1 T cocoa powder
1 c Fiber 1 original cereal
1/4 c coconut

Instructions

Mix Fiber 1 and coconut. In larger bowl.
In a microwave safe bowl, warm chocolate chips in microwave (about 1 minute).
Add peanut butter to soft chocolate chips and microwave (about 1 minute).
Stir in cocoa.
Add chocolate and peanut butter to cereal mix. Stir until coated. If the mix is a bit wet, add more cereal.
Place on cookie sheet or similar in 12 small piles.
Refrigerate about 2 hours.
Eat!

Really enjoyed the one I tried tonight. But it's worth noting that it was probably a shortage of water that has me craving the sweets. These seem like a much better choice then the chocolate chip cookies I wanted to make!

Eating right instead of eating wrong

2010-04-22T15:02:00.001-03:00

Eating right is a struggle for me.

Mary tweeted about grocery shopping everyday. She reminded me how far I've come. Not that many years ago I walked through a grocery store to get home everyday. My habit was to pick up supper and my 'snack' for the night. Usually large chips & dip, cookies, Smartfood, chocolate, or my favorite - cheesies. I often ate a large bag of cheesies in one night. Or two. But never three.

When Mary tweeted? My first thought was - wouldn't that be great - fresh fish every night. Quick access to fruit when you run out. Salads just waiting to be picked up. That was a great reminder of how far I've come.

But within a few minutes I knew that today I'd still much rather open a giant bag of cheesies then make a salad. It's hard to understand. The cheesies taste yucky. I feel yucky when I eat them. There's even an eating hangover where my body is dragging for eating them.

So I do the easiest thing possible. I don't buy cheesies. If they get left at my house after a party? They've been known to be opened and DUMPED IN THE GARBAGE. (Or dropped in a food bank box).

But removing the nasty food from the house is just creating a new bad behaviour. Lynn at Life Health Fitness called it Disordered Eating. Mine is less severe. I don't purge. But I do binge. There's a need to keep eating when I'm:

tired
bored
angry
alone or
with others

Sometimes I eat til I feel ill. I eat past the food tasting good. I eat when it makes me uncomfortable.

This behaviour? With the food hangovers, the yuck-factor? Gets in the way of my return to running. Slows me down. Makes me feel bad.

I'm going to beat it.

Eight years later, I can say that even if I lived IN a grocery store there will be no return to the daily intake of chips, chocolate or pop. That's a lifestyle change I've made.

And I'm keeping it.

Veggies gone wild!

2010-04-20T23:11:00.000-03:00

The challenge for April was about upping the veggie intake, but now the challenge got bigger. I've signed up for a program at the gym. It was supposed to be just a workout program, or so I thought.

But it's everything. And I'm now eating the Canadian Food Guide. For me that means:

Vegetables & Fruit - 7 to 8 servings
Grain Products - 6 to 7 servings
Milk & Alternatives - 2 servings
Meat & Alternatives - 2 servings

7 to 8 servings seems crazy. But I've mostly gotten it in since Saturday. Pretty proud of that. A little heavy on the fruit, but still, much better then my usual day. I'm ready for something to work for me. The trainer I'm working with lost 100lbs using the Canada Food Guide and exercise. This is the something to help me smash though the 220lb range down to below 210lbs. Think how much easier running will be when there's 10lbs gone!

Next I need to fill you in on how much water he has me drinking.

OK2010A! Challenge #4 - Increasing veggies

2010-04-18T23:06:00.000-03:00

Operation Kick 2010's Ass is commencing part IV.
Another month, another challenge. Are you ready?

This time we're back to a nutritional challenge. For the month of April your task is to eat two full servings of vegetables.

This is less than half of the recommended servings of vegetables each day. Two is better than none Two is nearly halfway to where you need to be.

Examples of one serving of vegetables:
five broccoli florets
ten baby carrots
one roma tomato
3/4 cup tomato juice
half of a baked sweet potato
one ear of corn
four slices of an onion
1 cup leafy greens

Potato does not count!

Here's a list of some interesting veggies. They can be canned, fresh or frozen.
http://cookery.newarchaeology.com/vegetables.php

Some suggestions for working your veggies in:
1. Soup with cabbage, spinach, carrots & celery something like the one I made but didn't eat
2. Spinach salad topped with strawberries, oranges & nuts
3. Roast cauliflower mashed half & half with boiled potato
4. Baked sweet potato done french fry style
5. Bake salmon with fennel and tomato.
6. Frozen stir fry veg with some soya sauce, oil, garlic, brown sugar or honey
7. Veggie fajitas
8. Roast root veggies and use on salad, quesadilla with feta, or on pasta with cream sauce
9. Caesar salad
10. Ants on a log

Hope you're in! Don't forget you're still working on
1. 30 min of activity a day
2. tracking food
3. squats challenge

Running - Slow, Fat and (sometimes) in Pain

2010-04-17T09:05:00.000-03:00

As promised in the bio this is a blog about a return to running. This month I made good on an early part of my plan. If I can't do it on my own, I need to get help.

So I've returned to the Running Room's Learn to Run program. It's what got me running outside last time. It's also where I met my running partner. My first night back I called speed dating. Only if there was someone as slow as me was I going to stick around. It was successful. And I was relatively fast!

We're three weeks in now and I'm not fast. At all. Not sure why I did so well the first night. Waiting for the magic to happen again.
The program to date is:

March 27th - Run 1 minute, Walk 2 minutes
April 3rd - Run 1 minute, Walk 1 minute x 10
April 10th - Run 2 minutes, Walk 1 minute x 7

You do your first at the time with the group on Saturday. Two more runs during the week on your own or with the Running Club at the Running Room. I've made it out to most Wednesday night runs at 6pm. Even made a Sunday morning.

This morning we tackle 3 min runs and 1 min walks. Wish me luck! I follow that up with a weigh and measure appointment for the Biggest Loser contest I've entered. It's going to be a big day.

OK2010A! Challenge #3 - Squat Challenge

2010-04-16T12:55:00.000-03:00

Let's skip to #4. Since March is now over, it's official, the squat challenge was a failure. But here's the blog post I SHOULD have put up.

Operation Kick 2010's Ass is commencing part III. Every month gives you another chance to start fresh.

For the third challenge I want you to sit your way to success. We'll be taking on the 200 Squat Challenge. It's well documented at http://www.twohundredsquats.com. There's even an iPhone & iPod Touch app.

Your commitment to the Squat challenge will count toward the 30 minutes of activity a day you're doing for the January challenge. The recommend time for you to a lot to the program is 30 min week over 3 days/week.

Why squats?

They're a functional exercise. They develop muscles and motions that we use ever day.
You can attempt the challenge to suit yourself. If 200 is too easy you can ramp it up with bicep curls. Too hard and you can repeat a week.
Squats don't require a special place. You can do them anywhere. No need to find a piece of floor to lay on. If need be you can lock yourself in a bathroom to get your squats done!
Low cost. The only costs for the squat challenge is your time. No need to buy equipment or join a gym.
Long-term commitment to health and fitness. The challenge will take as long as 6 weeks, taking us into the middle or April.
Long-term success. Next time you take a core class, stability ball class or other fitness class you'll be laughing at the request for two sets of 12 squats. That's just over 10% of what you can do!

To recap:
January was about doing 30 minutes of activity everyday. You're still committed to getting'er done.
February created the habit of writing down your food each day. Keep it up!
March is about adding a functional exercise to make us all stronger at everyday tasks.

On your mark, get set, SQUAT!

Singapore Noodles Recipe

2010-04-15T23:13:00.002-03:00

A go-to meal for me and the husband. Add in wonton soup and dumplings and sauce for the kids and it's a take-out cooked at home.

Singapore Noodles
Ingredients

1 T sesame oil
1 T peanut or canola or vegetable oil
4-6 tsp minced garlic
2 T slivered fresh ginger
1 cup cooked match stick sliced protein of choice (chicken, pork, egg white)
1 slivered onion
1 slivered green pepper
1 slivered red pepper
2-3 carrots turned into strips with peeler
1 sm zucchini turned into strips with peeler
add other veggies as desired peas, beans, green onions, etc
1/4 cup oyster sauce
3 T curry powder
2 tsp soy sauce
package of rice vermicelli
boiling water

Instructions

Heat cooking oil in wok. Cook garlic, ginger and onion until tender.
Start water boiling.
Stir fry protein until hot. Add veggies as desired and cooked to desired tenderness.
Make sauce with oyster sauce, curry powder, soy sauce. Add to veggies and protein.
Follow directions for rice vermicelli. Add cooked vermicelli to wok with sauce and protein. Stir.
Sit back and enjoy!

Would spaghetti squash noodles work instead of rice noodles? Let me know if you try it.

Slow Cooker Challenge

2010-04-14T22:57:00.002-03:00

Taking on more than reasonable seems to be my regular plan. School, sick kids, running and the gym keep me pretty busy. But a desire to be a real 'blogger' had me jumping up yelling, "Pick me! Pick me!" when Ali of Fat to Fit was looking for volunteers for the Health Slow Cooker Challenge. (She even has a pretty image that I don't know how to include.)

I did it! I did! My day was Sunday and I cranked up the crockpot just after midnight with my oatmeal for breakfast. But my excuses are almost as good for exercise as they are for blogging. It's almost the end of Wednesday and I'm just writing it up now.

So breakfast was a grand success. Inspired by Steve Dinn's success at losing 101 lbs in less than a year I have followed his breakfast habit of steel cut oats.

Guess what? Steel cut oats are even better in the crockpot. I threw in a cup of PC steel cut oats and 3 1/2 cups of water and let it go all night. In the morning I dressed it up with a bit of sweetened cocoa and milk. Delicious!

Following that success I tackled an evening meal. I made my ~~famous~~ refrigerator soup. The recipe has many steps. Enough to write them in a loop.

if fridge is not empty:
---remove item from fridge
---if item is a soup ingredient
------put item in pot
---else place item on counter

Sundays soup was the result of a full fridge. It was full of wonderful health goodness. The ingredients included:
8 cup turkey stock
1 cup diced turkey
1/2 bag of frozen thai veggies
thinly cut spinach
onion
celery
salt
pepper
roasted herbs
OXO beef package
prosciutto
left over roast veggies (onion, carrots, celery potato & sweet potato)
summer savory
bay leaves

It was delicious. From the one spoonful I ate I can tell you that.

But I'm tired. And stupid. And I make mistakes. So I tasted it. We went out for supper. I came back and FORGOT TO PUT IT IN THE FRIDGE. Found it the next morning. So it's deliciousness is now hanging out in my compost. So sad.

Thank you to Ali for letting me take part in the Slow Cooker Challenge. You can find more great Slow Cooker Challenge recipes at:
One Day at a Time
Fat to Fit
La Fuji Mama
Happiness is a Journey for Janna
Shari Rocks a Lot
Embracing Balance

OK2010A! Challenge #2 - Bite it and write it!

2010-02-11T15:02:00.001-04:00

Operation Kick 2010's Ass is commencing part II. It's time for you to jump onboard.

If you BITE IT, WRITE IT. For the month of February you are challenged to WRITE IT DOWN. You'll be recording your food everyday. Good days and bad days don't have anything to do with your calories, fat or choices. The only choice that is a bad choice is not writing it down (or lying to yourself about writing it all down).

It's pretty easy to do. You can make your own log book. Use a notebook. Log on to a site like SparkPeople. I'm planning to use an iPod Touch app called "Lose it!". Weight Watchers online or in person requires that you write it down (for some plans). As someone who has done this task before, here are my tips.

Have a back up plan. If you forget your iPod, you're not on your computer, or your notebook was left behind find someplace to write it down. It's easy to forget what you've eaten. I used to keep notepads in my bag, my diaper bag, and on the counter. At the end of the day I'd enter them all on the computer.
Be conscience of serving sizes and note that you had 3 servings of X or 1/2 a serving of Y.
Looking ahead to future challenges it's worth noting your water intake, fibre and a count of fruits & veggie servings.

Don't forget your 30 minutes a day of exercise is still expected. That was the new habit for January. This is the new habit for February.

The midway: 30 for 30

2010-01-20T19:03:00.000-04:00

Just a quick update on the 30 for 30 challenge. I challenged a few friends to 30 minutes of activity everyday for 30 days. It's been enough to get us all moving more. Some are more successful than others. It's a reminder that life does get in the way. For me, that life is a reminder of why I want to get healthy.

So what does 30 for 30 look like when you're 225lbs+? It looks really inconsistent! Here's a glimpse at my log.

Day 30 - I did 31 minutes of Wii games. Not the best workout, but something.
Also dragged the baby around in the carrier at the mall & grocery store for over an hour. Slow pace but holding an extra 15lbs.

Day 29 - I did my 30 minutes. Mostly stretching and the other exercises I'm supposed to do everyday for physio. Unfortunately I was too sore to do much else. Physio hurts.
Haven't logged on to Biggest Loser on the Wii in a few days. (Did I tell you it sucks and not to buy it? The interface is horrible).

Day 28 - Got my Wii time in today. 30 minutes of step, and step related all while wearing the baby (extra 15lbs).
Now I need someone to strip a turkey carcass for me.

Day 27 - 35 min on the treadmill courtesy of Dinosaur Train & the exersaucer

Day 26 - Squeezing it in! 38 minutes on Wii, with only 45 min left in the day

Day 25 - 20 min on the treadmill followed with 10 minutes of core and 5 min of stretching.

Day 24 - Does 2 hrs on my feet wearing the baby & prepping for a 3-year-olds birthday party count?
later that night 30 minutes of stretching done! I'm tired.
As for falling off the food wagon? There is no food wagon. There's just paying attention. (But I totally get the shoveling in of things that I *think* are going to taste good and when they don't? I keep shoveling).

Day 23 - Thirty minutes of the treadmill! Done. Love the exersaucer and TV. But I'm sad that my Nike+ appears to have died from disuse.

Day 22 - I did a mixed work out at the gym. 15 minutes on the elliptical. 5 minutes on the stepper. 15-20 minutes of stretching and the physio I was assigned.

Day 21 - Finally got my 35 minutes on the Wii

Day 20 - Today was at the gym. First measured day on my new begin to run program. An aggressive paced 15 min walk after 15 min warm-up on elliptical and about 15 minutes of stretching & back/butt strength moves.

Day 19 - I've got 25 minutes done. 18 min walk plus stretching.
much later Finished off with 15 minutes of Wii

Day 18 - Got 15 minutes on the treadmill done before 10am. Not sure what else is on for today, but it won't involve using my shins much!
much later I did some Wii Fit+

Day 17 - 34min on the Wii - strength & yoga

Day 16 - I got it done. 25 min walk. 14 min elliptical and my regular stretching & strengthening

Day 15 - Today was a quick gym day. About 20 min on learn to run program and 10 min on elliptical. I am tired.

You know how grateful I am to have access to and resources for a gym? and a Wii? and my own in-home high-end treadmill? It's great. I do appreciate it.

What are you doing? Want to get in on the end of the challenge? Or better yet, start your own.

OK2010A!

2010-01-13T23:32:00.000-04:00

This year has a theme for me. It's about embracing the whole of my life and living large.

My theme for the year, Operation Kick 2010's Ass (OK2010A!), started January 4, 2010.

You're welcome to be part of it. You're welcome to ignore it. This is part of how I'm going to face 2010, because 2010 is about generally maximizing fun for me, my husband and the kids.

Want to join me? You are officially challenged to 30 minutes of new activity every day for 30 days.

We're all busy. Some of us are parenting a number of kids, some of us have stressful jobs, some of us are in the middle of profound life changes. But your goal is to take on another 30 minutes of activity. Include your kids, do it at your desk, on the Wii, 3 sets of 10 minutes, 6 sets of 5 minutes; whatever it takes to get it done.

Walks, squats at the bus stop, a class, a swim, a run, a video... if you're struggling with how to get it done, ask for help. We've all got ideas and we've all got excuses. (I can help with coming up with excuses, too!)

There is no weigh-in. No need to point to a before and after. This is about feeling better and having more energy. About creating good habits and modeling good behaviour for others in our lives. The pride of accomplishment is your reward.

The Sound of Silence

2010-01-07T11:38:00.004-04:00

The silence is frustration. I'm bored of writing about excuses.

My treadmill has been as idle as my blog.
I hurt my back (again) and am just back to walking for fitness today.

But the blog, and my running, are both working on the same assumption:
I'm just going to have to start one more time then I stop.

Running fat & large, but RUNNING

2009-11-07T22:15:00.006-04:00

There are no speed records being set, but the running has begun.

The last two weeks have had somewhere between 4 to 6 walks of about 30 minutes. The first one was barely 2km, the last have been barely 3km.

But my assumptions that technology is smart made an ass of me again. My iPod must have completely died at some point and been recharged, but not synched. No idea what date my walks were recorded as over the last two weeks, so I can't provide the details.

Tonight I broke out with the 1 minute runs. The schedule was:
0-5 minute warm-up walk
1 minute run + 2 minute walk x 7
4 minute walk (at good pace)
about 5 minute cool down

Managed to cover around 3.5km. Still slow. Took me almost all of 30 minutes to get to 3km. My Nike+ claims my best 3km was 25min & 19sec. Who knows how long ago that was. Certainly pre-pregnancy.

It felt great. My intention was only to do 5 sets of the 1 minute run + 2 minute walk. But it was good so I kept at it. Plus there was a desire to reach 3km in 30 minutes.

Tonights walk/run (according to the iPod):
Distance - 3.39km*
Time - 35:32
Pace - 10:28min/km
Calories - 362
*treadmill claimed it was 3.5km and I stayed on the treadmill an extra 30 seconds to get there.

Anyone running fat? Running postpartum? You're welcome to keep me motivated by sharing your training.

Running fat: On the treadmill again

2009-10-28T22:55:00.005-03:00

Moving on up! Finally got off my rather large ass and got on the treadmill. 35 minutes while watching the Biggest Loser last night. My walks are a little faster than when I was 7 months pregnant, but still a quite slow.

But it was mostly good. I worked hard. Got a good sweat going. Was moving. I don't hurt today. That's all good.

Tonight I was too lazy to do it again, but I did pull out the Wii and did 32 minutes of Wii Fit. That's on top of my walking lunges and crab walk to the bus stop and the sumo walk back. The kids music class "Parent Room" was empty, so I did a few crunches, situps and planks.

My todo list is changing. Instead of just having my homework, things the kids need, meal prep and similar now it starts with "30 minutes of activity".

It feels good to move, to sweat and to feel strong. If I can work this in while parenting 3 kids and going to school? Surely you can, too.

The week in review

2009-10-20T13:17:00.007-03:00

Thursday night was weigh in. Down around 2lbs despite scarfing a McDs cheeseburger and cone on the way.

Friday

Saturday kicked off with boot camp offered through http://www.coressentials.ca/

Sunday

Monday got all the 64oz of water in. Mixed my high fibre cereal with a little granola and nuts. Grabbed a handful of walking squats on the walk to meet the bus.

Tuesday snuck in a panicked walk with a friend. We were both running late late late, so the stress didn't help. But about 30 minutes in. 64oz of water gone before 9pm. And a stability ball core class with Christina of Body & Spirit Fitness.

Wednesday the water was done. Cereal was eaten. And I did walking lunges on the way to the bus stop.

Thursday was a busy busy day. I don't think I did anything positive. And the week must not have been that good. I was back up all but .2 of what I'd lost.

Eating better

2009-10-19T22:26:00.007-03:00

Obesity Boot Camp taught me that the little things count. That I shouldn't be trying to change everything at once. That I shouldn't be focused on losing big amounts of weight over a little amount of time.

Since Canadians can't get on Biggest Loser, I kind of have to agree.

I think it was Health Psychologist Michael Vallis that spoke about a theoretical weight loss of 50lbs. That most of us would see success as losing 50lbs in 6 months and keeping it off for 5 years. According to him, long term success would look more like losing 10lbs over 3 months and keeping it off for a year. Then losing another 10lbs. Rinse and repeat until the last 9 months of year 5 you are at goal weight.

To do that? You make small changes and stick with him.

My small change last week was to drink 64oz of water everyday. To help me make it happen I've been putting a container of water (just for me) in the fridge each night to chill. (No more foot stomping and childish behaviour when the kids and husband use up all the cold water in the family pitcher).

It worked. I lost a 2.6 pounds.

This week my goal is high fibre cereal (Fibre 1 Honey Clusters) 5 mornings a week.

On Thursday I'll know if it worked.

Fibre1 Honey Clusters has the following nutritional information per 1 cup.
Calories 200
Fat 1.5g
Sodium 300g
Carb 43g (Fibre 13g)
Protein 5g

Plus it has 50% of my daily iron (something I need).

Something good to eat: Chocolate Banana Muffins

2009-10-16T16:24:00.009-03:00

Do you love chocolate? Need something tasty and real to fill those chocolate cravings? I made up this recipe and it's not too bad.

Super Simple Chocolate Banana Muffins

3 ripe bananas (mashed)
3/4 cup whole wheat flour
3/4 cup white flour
1/4 cup cocoa (could use more or none at all)
1/2 cup sugar
4 T applesauce
1 egg
1 tsp vanilla
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp baking powder
chocolate chips/nuts to taste

Mix it all together. Throw batter in the greased muffin tin (or large loaf pan). Pam works great. Bake at 350F for 15-20 minutes. Loaf will take longer.

Tip #1: Double the recipe. Scoop the first pan of muffins with no cocoa. Add the cocoa and chocolate chips to make your second pan.

Tip #2: Do NOT overcook. They get hard and dry.

Tip #3: They freeze REALLY well.

Tip #4: I think a muffin works out to about 3 points in Weight Watchers depending on how much chocolate chips and/or nuts are added.

Tip #5: A 1/4 tsp of salt doesn't hurt them at all.

Tip #6: See comments for adding zucchini.

Running fat: Checking in

2009-10-16T16:12:00.005-03:00

Still not running. Still not walking.
But! I did drop a couple of pounds in a week.
Running is still part of the equation, but here's a new interim goal. Losing 15 lbs by Thursday, December 17. So to keep track of where I was and where I'm going my starting measurements on October 8, 2009 were:

Weight - 224.4
Waist - 43
Left Arm - 14
Right Arm - 13.5
Left Leg - 26
Right Leg - 26
Hips - 52
Chest - 46

Running while fat: the first goal

2009-09-28T15:27:00.005-03:00

Success comes in many forms. Success for this summer was producing and caring for a beautiful new baby girl. She was a healthy 9lbs 15oz.

There were occasionally forays of activities. Two weeks on the treadmill again. Determination to get out walking. But nothing consistent.

I'm back within a few pounds of my pre-pregnancy weight. But I'm already fluctuating up from there. So that means it's time to kick this journey off again. I have so many excuses not to. Kids to care for. House to clean. Meals to cook. Homework to do. Classes to attend. But to paraphrase something I heard on CBC's White Coat Black Art - obese people don't get old. If you see an old fat person? Take a picture. Because most are dead.

Where am I starting from?

Slightly injured. My back lower back is hyper-extended (SI joint). That's causing some hip and shoulder problems, too. Prolapsed uterus that happened postpartum. (That has somewhat worsened the urinary incontinence).*
Haven't weighed myself in awhile, but I will!
No running partner. She's dealing with a long term injury.
Fluctuating between eating well and living on cookies.
Drinking my water more than half the time.
Doing a core-training class once/week.
Regular stretching and Physio that's helping the back, hip and shoulder.

The first goal?
Get moving again!
Hoping for two weeks with three or more walks of 30 minutes or more. (Some of those will be pushing a stroller with about 50lbs of kid in. Please forgive me if they're slow.)

Anyone in?

* Have to note that I'm not the only one. Thanks to Christie O for posting her True Confessions!

Running Fat & Slow (but with a partner)

2009-06-01T12:07:00.007-03:00

Active.com has a great article up about running with a partner.

I have to say, all 8 tips are ones that resonate with me. My running partner has been all of those things, and a great motivator. It was the driving force for many months to know that if I didn't get my training runs in, I wouldn't be able to keep up with her on our regular weekend run. I'm someone who hates to disappoint people, and I knew she wouldn't want to leave me behind, so it worked out well.

Stumbling across the perfect partner for me through the Running Room clinic was pure luck. How did you find your running partner?

Can't wait to be back out there with her. Not sure how long it'll take me to catch back up after the baby arrives!

Status update:
No strolls, walks or anything for me. I'm beat and uncomfortable these days. Growing a baby is hard work. Plus two sick kids. (Excuses are great).
36 weeks pregnant
Slightly over 252lbs (I did stay below 250 for nearly a month, but just jumped up there again today).
Water intake fluctuates, but it's better working from home than it was at work.

Running scared

2009-05-24T20:57:00.002-03:00

Sometimes you just need to do it.
Finishing last is not the end of the world.
Not trying? Is far more disappointing.

Rainy Saturday reminded me why I'm going to get back out there soon.

A little holiday from running fat

2009-04-26T19:56:00.002-03:00

Apologies for the delay in writing. There will be no activity in the next few days. The sick, the kids and the solo parenting are ruining my motivation. Will be back when the husband returns.

Logging activity: April 20, 2009

2009-04-20T22:15:00.002-03:00

2km stroll in less than 25 minutes. Slightly less pitiful than last night.
30 weeks pregnant
Slightly over 250lbs

Got my water in today. Signed up for Weight Watchers online again. Stayed within my points. Both positives.

On the negative side, I didn't get in enough fruits and veggies. Didn't eat the right kind of food.

What are you doing?

Lose weight to help the planet

2009-04-19T22:24:00.002-03:00

Lose weight to help the planet argue British researchers.

It's one small step towards making obesity something I can expect will cause me to be discriminated against. Not only is my weight problem hurting me, my family and my future, but now it's my fault that there's global warming.

Logging activity: April 19, 2009

2009-04-19T21:56:00.004-03:00

2km stroll in less than 28 minutes. Pitiful. But nice to get my heart rate up a little.
30 weeks pregnant
Slightly over 250lbs

Water challenge is going well. Week 1 complete. Stayed on track for 5 of the 7 days.
What are you doing?

Running Advice on Weight Watchers

2009-04-15T20:31:00.005-03:00

Just a couple of articles that Weight Watchers pushed out to me. Thought they might be helpful to others.

How do I move from running to walking? actually has some good advice. I think starting at two minutes would be too long for me, but everyone is different.

The bottom of Running 101 includes some suggestions on nice runs in Canada. I also liked this piece of advice, "Running is not sprinting. It is not done at a breathless, my-heart-is-going-to-explode-at-any-minute pace". So slow down and enjoy learning to run.

Advice for novice runners

2009-04-13T20:10:00.004-03:00

A reasonably good article about getting back to running, or starting, while staying injury free from CTVNews.ca.
Advice for novice runners

I really liked their plan for starting. It's nice and easy. Nice and slow. Something just about anyone can do.

Week 1 - 1 minute run, 4 minute walk x 5 times
Week 2 - 2 minute run, 3 minute walk x 5 times
Week 3 - 3 minute run, 2 minute walk x 5 times
Week 4 - 4 minute run, 1 minute walk x 5 times
Week 5 - 5 minute run, 1 minute walk x 5 times

Maybe that's the plan for you.

Weekly goals to help get back to slow running: Water

2009-04-10T08:25:00.009-03:00

The long term goal of this blog is to motivate me to get back to running. Since I've been mostly sedentary for about a month now, I've decided to set a simple goal each week. Hopefully all this prep will have me ready to hit my running circuit just a couple weeks after this baby arrives.

Facing down the 250lb mark again, after having been below it for 3 years might be a motivator, too. (For the record, my all time high weigh-in was 270lbs+).

This week I'm going to increase my water intake. I've fallen off the wagon in terms of healthy eating and drinking, so this is a simple step back.

Once upon a time I took a class about project management and the importance of having a plan to succeed. It's a good approach to accomplishing anything. Paraphrasing an excellent professor, a solid plan has at least:

A stated objective
The tasks required to complete the objective
A time frame to complete the tasks
A person assigned responsibility for the task
An estimate of required resources
Deliverable/Outcome

Finally there's a need to always look ahead to make sure that dependencies are accounted for and there are some contingency plans.

Drinking more water is probably more of a task, but I'll take it out a little further.

The objective:

Drink more water

The tasks:

Drink two cups of water before each meal & snack
Take a travel mug of water when on the road
Actually measure how much water goes in my standard drinking classes

The time frame:

Drink at least 8 cups of water/day and keep it up for at least 3 weeks

Responsibility:

That has to be me!

Required resources:

Mug at work
Ice cube tray at work

Outcome:

A lot more time in the bathroom.
Less last minute purchases of hot chocolate, juice, diet soda because there's no nearby cold water.
More satisfied feeling from my meals and less likely to over eat.

The dependencies:

Can't think of any.

The contingencies:

Traveling this weekend might be a problem. I'll be sure to drag around a travel mug so I don't have to waste money and environmental resources on bottled water.
Around the house I'll add a second jug of water to the fridge.
Make it part of my nightly routine to fill the ice cube tray.

Wish me luck!
I know from experience that simple adjustments can cause big changes. I lost my first 5 lbs (in about 1999?) just by giving up Coca-Cola. Maybe this will help hold my weight for the next couple of weeks.

Learning to Run to 1 minute

2009-04-09T22:12:00.005-03:00

After quitting the 'Learn to Run' class that was far beyond me, I kept going with the program. Moving inside to a gym treadmill I started on an easy pace. Week 1 was 3 days out. Each day was the same:
5 minute walk
1 minute run
1 minute walk
1 minute run
1 minute walk
1 minute run
10 minute walk

Important things I learned. The value of a good quality pad (I use Tena pads now). Going slow enough to not often need the pad. Going slow enough to still be able to talk, but hard enough that I wouldn't be able to sing.

It become clear pretty early that I needed to do my 3 walk/run days with a day off in between. But I was able to do a strength class on my days off. Or a circuit at the local women's gym. The strength training class as a Mum & Baby class. The circuit was something like what you'd find at Curves.

Because the class was Mum & Baby for those recently post partum it was heavily focused on ab and back strengthening. The warm ups were pretty easy. Usually a short march. Used thera-bands for a little upper body/arm strengthening. Many many many lunges (and more and more each week). Every week there was an ever increasing number of sit-ups and variations. Some of the easiest to get started were a standard sit-up with legs supported on an exercise ball (or chair).

At this point I was at the gym 5 days a week. I ran 3 days. Took my class on the other 2. But time wasn't much of an issue since it was usually a 30-minute trip (including dropping the kids at the daycare) for my run days. The Mum & Baby classes were a bit more time consuming. Maybe 45 minutes? Plus I'd often have to stay a bit late and find a quiet spot to nurse the newest who was just a couple months old.

For the record: Today was my pre-natal check-in. It was bad, as expected. I 'clocked' in at 247lbs. Still not doing anything.

The first run

2009-04-04T21:45:00.001-03:00

It was the beginning of April. Warmer than you might expect for my climate (5C). I joined a sister and her friend for my very first running class. It'd been three months since I birthed my second child. My exercise was modest. But I was back at Weight Watchers and down to 221.4lbs. (Down from ~240lb pre-baby).

The class was intimidating. There were all shapes and and sizes, but I was by far the fattest. The largest. The least impressive looking.

Our first night was going to be running down a major highway in my small community. I was embarrassed I'd be seen. Afraid I couldn't do it.

They were reasonable fears. All true in the end. I was seen. I couldn't keep up. We covered 3.4km. The whole thing as 1 minute runs and 1 minute walks. Or some people did. Not me. We were rained on. All in all, it was an ordeal that I never wanted to repeat.

I made many mistakes on that first run. It was too fast. It was too far. I tried to keep up. I was over dressed. By far the most embarrassing part was that I leaked. As in urinary incontinence. Cold, wet, covered in hives and dragged myself home and into the shower and swore to never return. (A quick shower, of course, the baby was waiting to be fed!)

There were three positive things that came out of that class.
1. I stuck with the running, not the class, but the running.
2. I got a training schedule that got me started.
3. I got a sheet of stretches that became my bible.

Maybe the larger thing is that I learned that this had to be about me, about my program and not about what a 140lb 5'10" man thought would be easy for anyone.

For the record: I'm frightened to weigh myself. I'm coming up on 28 weeks pregnant and I was over 245lbs last time I checked. Gained 5 lbs in a week. My prenatal workout class has ended and I haven't been on the treadmill in over a week.

Starting out... all over again

2009-03-23T19:51:00.001-03:00

I started this blog with the intention of keeping track of my running journey. I'd just completed my first (and only) 10K run and was excited to set a new set of goals. But life got in the way.

Who would be interested in my running blog? Not many people. But there's a target audience out there. Those who are starting out morbidly obese. Where I was when I started.

Instead I'm 6 months pregnant and back to walking 2km 3-4 times a week. It's not ideal. But I am moving. And that's important.

If you're interested, stick around. I'm going to re-tell the story of post-partum obesity running, and then use that as the inspiration to do it all over again.

For those that think they can't do this? Think again. I've been morbidly obese or obese since I was 8-years-old. I'd never run before March 2007. I've birthed two children. The only things I had going for me? I'm not that old. I don't have high blood pressure. I don't have diabetes. I don't smoke and I don't drink. But if you're all those things? You can still do what I did. Just check with your doctor before you start.

For the record:
March 23rd - over 240lbs and about 6 months pregnant.